freaking out

I've been freaking out a lot in the past 24 hours. And crying for that matter. Last night I was laying in bed next to Ronnie with my hand on my tummy, trying to find baby girl. I never really know where she is. Then I felt her move for the first time!!! I freaked out and started crying because she is real. "Holy shiz, there's a baby in there?" Yeah, there is. Sometimes you forget you're pregnant. Even when you're sick everyday and getting fatter and buying baby clothes and thinking of names. It's not just a simple thing really realizing that you have a baby inside you. Until it moves and you can feel it. And then, holy crap there's a tiny little person moving around in there. It's amazing. And intimidating. I've only recently started considering all the seriousness of this. I've always been way excited to get pregnant and have a baby and I still am. But now I'm thinking more about how I will be responsible for the livelihood and happiness of a human being. It's pretty nuts.

Back to feeling baby girl move: I can only feel her when my hand is pressed real close to my lower abdomen, so I'm not at that stage where I'm just standing around and I can feel it. But now I'm obsessed with feeling her move so I do weird things to get her going, like laugh or cough or move into weird positions.

Also, just so you know, I kind of have a belly now. Unfortunately, it's mostly my guts protruding. Baby is nice and low and not poking out much, but thanks to my consumption of lots of dairy I get nice and bloated and my intestines stick out nice and good. So that's what you're seeing people. Don't get too excited.

Another recent freak out was caused by this trailer:



I was balling. I think it's looking amazing so far. I am so excited for this to come out even though I am balling my eyes out just thinking about it!

Another trailer that had me balling uncontrollably in the theatre was this one for "The Vow." I don't even know what happened, but I was like hysterically crying in the quiet theatre over this thing. It was really embarrassing. And Ronnie was laughing his head off at me. Welcome to the hormone roller coaster of pregnancy.




In other news, we are house hunting. The lovely family whose house we are sitting will be back in March so we need a new place to live. We are looking to buy a house since it's pretty much cheaper than renting. I can't wait to have my own house and to start decorating baby girl's room! Wish us luck!